Remembering Sean
REST IN PEACE, SEAN
It has been a week since the fatal accident which took the life of my nephew and his friend. A third young man is recovering from extensive surgery to correct internal injuries. The driver - who is responsible for this horrific crash - suffered a broken leg.
Initial reports painted these kids as irresponsible and intoxicated, but the DA has recanted his statement that beer bottles and a controlled substance were found at the scene. However, this doesn’t excuse the actions of the driver - a 20 year old man, who “put the pedal to the metal” when he saw police lights flashing in the rear view mirror after racing through a speed trap. The vehicle was going nearly 100mph when it crashed into the building, killing Sean and his friend TJ.
My brother Steve and sister-in-law Diane received the phone call that Sean had been involved in an accident, in the early morning hours on Saturday. They rushed to the hospital to find out that Sean had a traumatic head injury, and had very little brain activity. The doctors were not hopeful at all; if Sean survived, he’d be in a vegetative state.
Sean carried an organ donor card, and my brother and his family were counseled by the folks who run the organ donor and transplant program. When it was determined that Sean was officially gone, they honored his wishes, and donated his organs so that other lives could be saved.
From what I understand, his heart went to a man in his 40s who has a wife and children, and has been waiting for a long time for a new heart. There is some degree of comfort in knowing that a part of Sean is still alive. I’m not sure what other organs were also gifted to those in need.
It has been a very hard week for all of us. I can’t even imagine the soul-wrenching agony that Steve, Diane, and niece Rachel are going through. I know for me, it’s been a week of never-ending tears, sad dreams, and a desire to gather up my children and lock them safely away from the dangers in this world.
I am thankful for the friends and family who have shared tearful conversations with me. I am also thankful to all of you, who commented or sent private messages of sympathy. Grief, not only for the loss of Sean, but for the rest of his family, is so heavy on my heart. I feel like I’ve lost one of my own children.
I feel sad that I didn’t know Sean the way that the rest of my family did. We moved away from Philly in 1993, when Sean was only a baby. I kept up with what was going on in his life through conversations with Diane, but that’s not the same as seeing him on a regular basis and spending time with him. Now that he’s gone, his friends have been posting videos and photos on Facebook, and I’ve found myself smiling at his sense of humor and typical teenage antics. I would have loved to have spent time with him over the years.
I want to believe that Sean is now in the loving embrace of my parents - his grandparents - and that we will all be together again when our time on this earth comes to an end. It’s what comforts me.
Sean touched the lives of so many people, and was loved by everyone who knew him. The world has lost a wonderful young man who had a great future ahead of him. I hope he’s building motorcycles for the angels now.
Rest peacefully, Sean.
Susan I’m in tears reading this. My heart aches for you and your family. I’m so so sorry. I know it must be even more difficult with you being so far away. Alaska is a beautiful place, but in times like this, home is where the heart is.
One of my favorite verses from Gods promises is found in Psalms 30:4 “Weeping will endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning”.
xo from afar.
S.
[Reply]
Comment by Another Susan — August 22, 2010 @ 8:30 pm
Susan,
I’m crying reading this journal entry….I’m so sorry for you and your familie’s loss. Having children or young adults and reading this gives a person a wake up call that we do not know when it will be our time to go and it is never easy to have loved ones pass on.
Remember all the Great Memories and keep making more with the ones that are still here
(((HUGS)))
Liz
[Reply]
Comment by Liz McCollough — August 23, 2010 @ 4:47 am
I hope you can find comfort in knowing that time heals. While he will always be missed, the edges of your heart will feel less raw with each passing day.
[Reply]
Comment by Hayley — August 23, 2010 @ 8:14 am
It is so hard to wrap your head - let alone your heart around anything that has to do with death whether its a co-worker or a family member - it is all more than we can handle. My heart hurts for your heart and the family. I know how this feels. Twenty plus years ago I buried a son on Birch Hill. My hubby & I will put this prayer in our morning prayers for the next week dedicated to Sean. Sweet Susan, take deep breaths and please feel all the hugs around you as crutches to hold you up through this ugly time…….mary
Oh, Thou kind Father, God. Graciously bestow a pair of heavenly wings on this your new fledgling so that he can wing his way toward the apex of prosperity and salvation with the utmost joy and happiness.
O my God! O Thou forgiver of sins, bestower of gifts, dispeller of afflictions! Verily, I beseech Thee to forgive the sins of such as have abandoned the physical garment and have ascended to the spiritual world.
O my Lord! Purify them from trespasses, dispel their sorrows, and change their darkness into light. Cause them to enter the garden of happiness, cleanse them with the most pure water, and grant them to behold Thy splendors on the loftiest mount.
[Reply]
Comment by Mary — August 23, 2010 @ 9:00 am